All Kinds of Minds

I've meant to post this TED Talks video of the autistic and amazing Temple Grandin. She has pretty much redesigned the standards of the majority of slaughterhouses in the country and speaks on autism issues. It's so true how different ways of thinking and learning need to be recognized.

"We've got to think about all these different kinds of minds. And we've got to absolutely work with these kind of minds, because we absolutely are going to need these kind of people in the future"

A Dream Deferred

My English Comp class assignment now is to write a research paper on a poem of our choosing. In trying to find a poem I could connect to, I recalled a short poem by Langston Hughes, "Harlem", sometimes known as, "A Dream Deferred". I first read it in high school. And I found it applied well to my situation these days. Keep pursuing those dreams!

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
     like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
    And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
     like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

Luck

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.” —Seneca

A good friend of mine called tonight. She’s a Korean woman in her 50s, with two sons in their 20s. When she and her family came to the US, she knew little English and had little money. And while her sons were still in grade school, she enrolled into community college to become a dental hygienist and has now been working years in a job she loves. Ironically, her son is currently in a similar situation as I: going to community college to take prerequisite courses and on to a masters. Similarly, my own mother went back to school to get her Masters in Education in her 40s while working and raising the remaining two of four kids at home. When I think of all both have accomplished with limited resources but a determination and passion that helped get them through, it is no wonder they've both been an inspiration to me lately.

While catching my friend up to date on my progress, I expressed a frustration I continue to cross: There are so many steps towards my goal, I’m exhausted (yet elated) when I clear one. But it's short-lived, because just beyond, I see the next one. She laughed and knew exactly how I felt. It’s never quite “over”. The best way to not let it get you down, is to take it one step at a time.

And yet, I feel I’ve cleared so many complex obstacles that I should be further ahead than I am. In the beginning, I wanted to give up 100 times. It would have been the easy way. But I kept thinking about my current job that sucks any joy of life out of me. The idea of being in that same position when I’m 50 propelled me to keep going. Here’s just a list of what I did in the first 4 months (October-January) of preparation.

1. Wonder how to juggle work, classes in evening, and volunteer work. Almost sold my apt. and quit my job, to move back with parents and take all the classes I thought I’d need
2. Visit PA school program to find out what classes I needed (fortunately not as many as I thought)
3. Sent applications to hospital to volunteer for patient care. Why? I need 1000 hours (!!!!) of direct patient care
4. Worried when I didn’t hear back from hospitals
5. Signed up with NewYorkCares.org to do hospital volunteer work in case a hospital never replied
6. Elated when one loca hospital returned my application and called me in. Turned out to be better, since it's a convenient location
7. Got medicals done (TB blood test, MMR test)
8. 4 blood vials later, it was found I had no immunity to mumps and borderline for rubella.
9. Got an MMR booster shot
10. Started volunteer work at hospital
11. A month later, had to have more blood drawn to confirm the MMR vaccine took. Also had to take a drug test
12. Visited 1st Community College – found out I was too late to enroll for spring. Persisted and got admitted. 4 hrs running around
13. Visited 2nd Community College – more conveniently located, more available seats for same classes at CC1. 5 hours running around
14. Enrolled in English Comp I

So many times I wanted to quit. Every step was painful and contained several more little steps, never straight-forward. But surprisingly, the more I kept going, the easier it became. Things started to fall in place, wheels started to click, and I met people in the same situation who only inspired me more. All this preparation has brought me this far. And I feel lucky.

Doctor Confidence

"We lose a little dexterity, but we gain a lot of confidence." at The Cartoon Bank

Just Begin It

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When I started this crazy undertaking, I literally thought "This is crazy". I felt a little on my own and unsure how to get from A to B. But the great thing I'm realizing is, the more you get involved in any place you choose to start, the more connections start to be made. Just starting is a huge step. But you'll find yourself in the circles you need to be in, before long. I've met so many great volunteers at New York Cares and at the hospital who are following similar paths. And it's incredibly helpful in pushing me forward.

There have been people who can tell me what to do in order to get the classes I need. You can't be shy; I ask tons of questions on the off-chance they can give me a hint of information or an edge. One volunteer has been working for some years in a job after graduating from a liberal arts college. She has just been accepted to several med schools after spending evenings taking pre-med courses. Another guy had been working in the city in the fashion world. He was just accepted to top med schools. I'm in awe. These examples make me feel like it's truly possible. It's one thing to believe it, but it's a bonus to meet them and hear that they've gone through all the same ups and downs you've gone through. That's a big part of why I'm doing this blog. Perhaps it will inspire someone else that it's never too late to try and the cards are never stacked too high.

Don't Hesitate

"If you hesitate, you're dead." This is what my Norwegian friend told me as a car sped through. I remembered it recently, while planning my PA goals. It's become a mantra. Nike's "Just Do It", is another one I try to repeat over and over. I can't let myself hesitate or think too much of what must be overcome.